The Power Of Investment In Friends And Family

Investment in yourself can overlap in the area of Friends and Family. Self love is choosing to allow your self to be loved. To be seen is to be loved. Friends and Family are the people we choose to love, support, care for, learn from, and grow with. I refer to this as the “Friends and Family Sphere” in our lives.

Perhaps we work to raise empathetic children, support friends in their own purpose journeys, or provide dignified care to our elders. Our efforts in this sphere directly impact those humans and increase collective well-being. Importantly, these efforts also set an example for others around us, strengthening the web of essential personal support networks for everyone. And our investments in the Family and Friends Sphere pay us back as well.

Having loving, trusting, and reliable relationships increases our likelihood of survival by 50 percent at all ages!

Despite the huge potential influence we can have in this area, it’s often overlooked and undervalued in our culture, and therefore by ourselves and each other. This work is often invisible or taken as mere obligation (or pleasure). It’s assumed to take second fiddle to professional obligations or even Community or Money activities. Either way, it isn’t recognized for its potential potency.

Culturally, our efforts in building our family or community are explicitly ignored. Increasing attention has been paid to the value of the so-called “invisible labor” of raising children and caring for elders or family members with disabilities. In 2021, the global economic value of that work was quantified at over $10 trillion.62 (Curious what you’re “earning” at home? Check out the Invisible Labor Calculator, which Amy Westervelt created to help bring awareness to the value of this work.

Alongside their economic value, our efforts in the Family and Friends Sphere have a massive impact and contribute very powerfully to purposeful living. By creating secure attachments, imbuing a growth mindset, fostering a sense of curiosity and empathy, and facilitating a wide variety of experiences for our kids or other family and friends, we shape (and are shaped by) humans who are more able to lead and live purposefully.

To appreciate the depth of this influence, reflect for a minute on what you learned from your parents and/or the other adults who were present in your childhood.

What did they teach you about food and mealtimes? About work? Money? Relationships? Trust? Responsibility?

These might’ve been implicit or explicit lessons and more or less positive or desirable from your vantage today. But there’s no denying that our intimate relationships have huge sway on the people we become—who go on to impact other generations.

What do those moments of influence on someone else do for you?

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By Nell Derick Debevoise, Senior Contributor